Reprinted from "Crown Jewels of the Wire", February 1988, page 33

We had been gone all day, and it was good to be getting home. As we turned into the driveway, it was evident that the usually "on at dusk and off at dawn" vapor light was not doing its thing and the yard was forebodingly dark! As we stopped to unlock the gate the headlights picked out our two happy, healthy dogs and a disturbing array of scraps of paper and plastic scattered across the front yard.

"Oh, no, the U.P.S. man left my package," Pat said, knowing that in our absence the driver was in the habit of dropping a package (encased in a plastic bag in case of rain) over the fence.

Father hurried to feed the ducks -- about 60 noisy, persistent, permanent visitor mallards, and pick up the mess in the yard. I went through the house and opened the back door where Ursa, the 8 months old Rottweiler, was waiting with a smile and a piece of paper in her mouth. I took it and read, "Dear Pat,". So, it wasn't addressed to me, I kept on reading it anyway. "Here is the CD 102 Diamond with small drips and backward 2...etc." I did not know about this transaction, so of course this pretty well goofed up one of Pat's surprise Christmas presents for me!

After Pat came in and saw the note, and saw that I had seen the note, he gave me a dirty look, got the flashlight and went looking for the insulator. He found it in one of the dog houses. It was unwrapped, but unharmed except for a coat of puppy slobbers.

So the Christmas surprise was ruined, but he insulator was O.K., and we had a laugh about the whole thing because Ursa carries things like rocks, heavy metal sprinklers and clay flower pots around all the time. Yeti, the other dog, is older and more mature.

This should be the end of the story, except the best is yet to come!

Because it was cold, Pat went out to light the fire in the glass house, so my plants wouldn't freeze. Ursa suddenly appeared with another empty torn-up small cardboard box which she smilingly presented to him. "Oh, ----------!" he said, noticing the partially chewed-up return address. In the next few days he had been expecting another package which, Behold!, had arrived early. No CD 102 was this one! It was an extremely dark emerald green, tall, no button, flared skirt E.C.&M.!!

I should explain that we live out in the boonies with 3-1/2 acres of creek, pond, oak trees, granite rocks and many other miscellaneous obstacles hazardous to a stray insulator. It was not a pretty picture to envision what could have happened to the insulator, and the look in Father's glazed eyes said it all! Before a heart attack set in, he took the two dogs and the biggest flashlight and started the search. They found the insulator, unharmed and still wrapped in newspaper, up along the fence in the comer of the property where Ursa had probably dropped it to bark at a passing jogger. The E.C.&M. survived the experience better than Pat who will probably never be the same again!

Well, that is the end of the story, except that Ursa is still smiling....